scattering and focus

I left an email list last week that I've been on for years.
It was a seemingly small decision. I wasn't exactly certain at the time why I left, but it felt like the right choice to make.
I wanted to pare down things in my life to do some thinking and reorganizing of priorities.
Until I cut myself off from it I didn't realize how much energy I was giving to the list.
I wouldn't have guessed how much my focus was scattered by having the list there, as a sort of crutch. I must have popped on a dozen times a day to read any new emails, or to post something that came to mind that I knew someone onlist would enjoy.
Absolutely nothing wrong with that in and of itself, but without the list it has seemed easier to focus on reorganizing priorities toward health and income. Not everything is in place yet, but its a lot closer.
Other keys have been relinquishing the hope of doing any gardening, and trying not to allow the disorganization of the house entice me into standing too much.
If I give Oscar time, he eventually helps get the pieces in place for me to help safely. Yesterday he cleared the sink area, allowing me to focus my time on washing the dishes. A few more dishpans full and I will be able to move a chair into position so I can sit as I wash dishes. He will also help clear the pathway for the wheelchair. It takes longer, as he's working overtime.
I am still ill from overdoing a few weeks ago, but the more I rest, the better I become. The fevers are coming less often, and the cramps are gone unless I sit upright too long again.

I currently plan return to the list after my new work habits are in place, as I care deeply about many people there, maybe early next year. Of course I write off list to friends made there.